ThoughtfulChaos

Its 7:30 PM IST... I am still in office and am tired... very tired. Not physically of course but mentally tired from the tons of reading I have had to do to catch up on what I missed when I was on leave. I am literally fatigued by information overload. I have dealt with all the mails, read all the notices and alerts, received all the bills and made plans to pay them... but there are still 300+ unread items in my feed reader. Sometimes I am sorely tempted to right click and select "Mark All as read" choice... but I refrain. Because I know there are many gems hiding in there and I am somewhat phobic of missing out on something good. Is this some form of Net addiction? I think it is. I decided to quit for today when I realized that I was merely reading without comprehending.

And I decided to blog. This post started out as a post about my Ahmedabad trip but I discovered that I am too tired to write about that. It was a very interesting trip and I want to make sure I do not miss out on anything. So I have put it off till tomorrow...

The past 2 days have been pretty mundane. Reached Pune early morning yesterday, went home and got some sleep. Couldn't sleep in the train... don't know why but I had a splitting headache. Lately I have discovered that my ability to sleep anywhere anytime is not what it used to me. My classmates in Lambodar Mishra's classes and classmates at DA-IICT will vouch for my renowned ability to sleep right under the professor's nose. Anyway... Yesterday was a catching-up day at office. Worst part was the canteen food. Feels like a rude shock after having homemade food for many days. I came in a little early today. Read a little of this, a lot of that and still a pile remained.

Then came the low point. I am in a very interesting R&D project but unfortunately the area of work does not appeal to me that much. Colleagues are very nice, Boss (and Big Boss) is understanding and helpful and the environment very free but somehow I am bored of the whole thing. So I decided to talk to the big boss about the possibility of getting a release. Boss, Big Boss and I met in the afternoon to talk about this. And I was told that there was no way I could get a release at least till June next year :-( Boss is leaving the project in a couple of months time (going abroad) and it would simply be too large a void to fill if I were to leave. This is both bad news and ultrabad news because Boss is probably the only person who has an idea of the big picture. He is a gem of a person with tons of energy and an excellent understanding of the past, present and future of the project. The Big Boss(es) above him provide the theory inputs, the general guidance and intellectual fodder for the project. People like me try to understand how to implement small small parts of the big picture and then implement them. But the only person who knows enough of both is Boss. And he is leaving :-( Just in case you are wondering 'Boss' is a senior colleague with whom I work and who you can call my immediate superior. 'Big Boss' sits at the top of the pyramid and is a genius who does in 2 hours what takes me a week. Conventionally 'Big Boss' would be called a PL (Project Leader) but since our team has a flat structure there are officially no bosses, just team members.

Am feeling a little down because I was positive there would not be much of a problem getting a release and shifting to another project and possibly another city (Mumbai?). Hmmmm... how do I deal with this? Right now I am not thinking much (as I said before I am simply too tired) but this pretty much derails many of plans. The feeling is yet to sink in and the dissection yet to come. Now I might finally buy that bicycle and bookshelf... I had postponed buying them just in case I had to move. I might also finally buy a bed (Mom. you reading this?). Am also thinking of getting an Internet connection at home so I can pursue some of my hobbies more aggressively.

However there was 1 piece of good news. My Mom has got a promotion. She works for BIS (Bureau of Indian Standards) and she is now an 'Assistant'. In case you are wondering what BIS does think about the 'ISI' mark... BIS is the institution that issues that mark. I have absolutely no idea what an Assistant does but Mom sounded very happy on the phone so I am happy :-) All the best Mom!

OK guys... thats all for now. Drop me an email or call me... that might cheer me up a little. Byeeee